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Grieving And Releasing A Relationship

love-relationship-breakupAnyone who has ever gone through a breakup or lost a loved one knows that grieving and releasing a relationship is an ugly process. This is true for anyone going through a breakup and even for those who may have initiated the breakup in the first place.

When you are in a romantic relationship, the brain releases endorphins which are associated with the feelings of pleasure and happiness. However, if you lose a loved one or end a relationship, stress hormones flood the system. Releasing a relationship can be emotionally draining. It is imperative that you move forward and let go of the past with the thought that the best is yet to come. Only after grieving and releasing a relationship can you let go of negative feelings and truly prepare for a better future.

It is generally thought that there are five stages of grieving. It starts from denial, anger, bargaining, depression and ends at acceptance. All of us go through these five stages of grieving, and they help us move on.

Understanding how you grieve is the key to overcoming it. Your first reaction is denial. This is a defense mechanism that blocks the sudden shock and protects you from despair. You’re just not ready to accept that the relationship has ended. However, this is a transient response, and pretty soon you will be moving on to pain and anger.

What comes next is that you start isolating yourself. Resentment and anger become your go-to feelings to deal with the pain. You are bound to blame everyone including yourself for the heartbreak. It is just not healthy.

Soon after that, you’ll start bargaining. You’ll understand that you need to regain control of the situation. You’ll do all you can to get back into control. But if the relationship has ended, it has ended. This will inevitably result in depression.

Overcoming depression is quite the task during grieving and releasing a relationship. You’ll have to be pro-active here. Maybe change your lifestyle and be more active. It is tough, but you will come out of it if you have the right kind of people around you.

Finally, you should be able to accept the reality and make peace with yourself. This is where grieving and releasing a relationship finally comes full circle. By now, you should be able to let go and move one. The acceptance stage involves withdrawal and calmness. Here, calmness does not mean happiness, but it’s just a way to cope with the loss and overcome the grieving process.

The following rituals may help you grieve and release a relationship:

  • Write out your feelings on a piece of paper. Try confiding in your diary, make a note or maybe burn a photograph to let out the anger. You should know why you’re doing this. It should be done with the clear intention of letting out the negative energies coming from within yourself.
  • Do yoga or meditate. Yoga and meditation are awesome mind-body practices that will allow you to get in touch with your feelings and relax. They will help you control your stress and maintain blood pressure and heart rate as well.
  • If you feel grief overcomes you, indulge in some hobby to keep yourself occupied and calm. It will help you by giving you a break from the turmoil and clear you mental state. Developing a creative hobby like crafting, painting, reading or writing, will lift your spirit and help in healing.
  • Travel to somewhere new that has no memories of your past relationship associated with it. Another great way to release stress and refresh your mind.

As mentioned before, it is necessary that you understand your grieving process since there are so many difficult emotions involved. Trying to resist grieving will only make grieving and releasing a relationship all the more complicated. You’ve got to know that you can grieve for a while and eventually come out on top.

About Joseph Giove

Joseph R Giove is a MindBody Wellness Coach, biomedical engineer and clinical hypnotist. For over 30 years he has helped people in all areas of health and fitness including weight loss, exercise physiology, addiction, stress and anxiety, insomnia, depression, diabetes, nutrition, chronic pain, and more. He offers a unique understanding of the mind and body to help you renew, recover from illness, and live optimally with vitality and vigor.

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